Secondary characters - and there aren't many of significance - are also a little flat, but interesting foils. There's maybe a little more "and then he kills ANOTHER wolf" than is needed, tbh, but I'm not sure what to suggest as a remedy.Ĭharacter - This is probably the story's biggest weakness so far, even the MC is a little flat. Advancement is rapid gains from the first fight with a strong new opponent typically make related monsters easy prey. Fight scenes are very well written, with rich detail and plausible "cool moves". Story - Honestly it's dragged in a few places, mostly in between "key fights". The occasional typo never loses the meaning or enjoyment. Grammar - could probably use a proofreader, but most stories could. It's a harsh System, even in the tutorial, but there's intriguing hints of even deeper complexity within.
Definitely not cultivation style, but clearly emphasizes the strength of a "style" for each character. System is complex and comprehensive, an interesting blend of a few other concepts. Style - the extended "tutorial stage" nicely sets up the MC and the System. Just discovered this story the other day, I binged it in two days over lunch at work. Which is a darn shame since if you can read past it's problems it promises to tell a fun (though somewhat standard at this point) system apocalypse story. The issue drags the whole thing down to the point where I wouldn't actually recommend it. It very much needs someone to spend a good lot of time going through and fixing it all, it's pervasive. Like another review mentioned, the constant shift between past and present tense makes it a rough read. moments? There is a specific choice in particular stands out as the worse choice by a longshot, but I suppose he is meant to have been drawn to it for. except when he seems to have story related. The MC seems to make fairly thought out choices. The MC barely meets the rest of the cast. So far there hasn't been a whole lot of character interaction so far. He pretty instantly starts defeating things way above his level. He was a fighter before the system hit, and golly gee does a world full of stuff to beat up suit him well. MC is the loner of the tutorial, and the badest of the bad. The MC starts with a spear though so that's different. I quite like the overall story thus far, it's very inspired by Primal Hunter for the start from what I can see. Will Zane survive the dangers that awaited him?Īnd even if he lived, what will happen to the old earth that he was destined to return to?Īt least one chapter will be released every day at 6 : 00 CETĬhapter 42. Transported into a new world, filled to the brim with deadly creatures and powerful beings. Right after he had lost everything that had mattered in his life, it had chosen the earth as the next planet to be integrated into its ever-growing empire of empowered beings. Yet, the system had other plans for Zane Black. But despite how hard he had tried to save her, Death was ever so slightly ahead of him. From his parent's sudden demise to his sister's life-threatening ailment, Zane cursed the fact that he was the only one who was spared from Death's clutches.īeing the odd one out, he was given the responsibility of taking care of his dying sister, Jeanne. Growing up, death had always surrounded Zane's family. While that doesn't excuse the problems that this story has, I hope that you can be patient with them. This is the first fiction I've ever written. I've fixed even more stuff since their first release.
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